I have noticed that people often say; “That’s just the way I am” or “I could never do that”. Often this is said in relation to something that people are scared of or something they think they can’t handle. It seems to be a habit to say and decide that “it just can’t be done by me”.
I started wondering why people do this. Maybe it’s a way to stay in our comfort zone.
Let´s take my mother for an example. She was always so afraid in an airplane when it was taking off. She would hold her head and rock back and forth, like if she was really going insane. One time when we were flying together she got a newspaper that she read while the other passengers got seated. In it she saw an obituary about a man that she knew. The plane was getting ready to take off and my mother also started getting ready for her “take off pose”. I decided to do a little experiment, to draw her attention from the plane taking off and to something else like the obituary. I started to ask her numerous questions about the man that had died how she knew him and I got her to tell me stories about the man. Before we knew we were in the air and she had not been scared at all. I pointed this out to her and she was incredibly surprised because there was not even a hint of fright in her when she was busy talking about the man. After this experience she has never been afraid at take off. This is just a little example of something she had convinced herself off, this is just the way I am, I’m always afraid when the plane takes off.
When we are plugged into fear of something we automatically get scared when faced with that situation. By saying that we cannot do this or that or we are afraid of something, we close the option of being able to do it or facing it without fear.
Let´s face our fears! Have courage to be able to react in a new way than before, don’t decide in advance that you can’t. Try this by facing something you are afraid of, it doesn’t have to be a big thing for example saying your opinion to someone or telling someone you love them.
When we think of success we tend to think about the money we would like to have, all the things we like to buy, the kind of house we would like to live in etc. I think all those things are just one manifestation of success. Those are just the things that follow success and some of us find so attractive. 